Dear The Wurzels,

My understanding from BBC Wiltshire is that much of the nation’s farming community is bemoaning its current subsidy-strapped plight. Your purchase of a brand new ‘blingy thresher’ in said climate as opposed to a perfectly functional second-hand model, and your gleeful pop-chart boasting, is therefore ‘not on’.

 

You have also clumsily revealed also that you often guzzle apple-based fermented brewings, namely cider. 'I drinks in every day, ooh arr', you furthermore foolhardily divulge. Given that arable chores are most effectively conducted in daylight hours, it necessarily follows that you are saddled in a contraption consisting of rapidly propelled oscillating razor sharp blades of 10 foot plus in length while totally 'refreshed', as I believe you pop stars' publicity people call being completely sozzled.

 

I Bid You Good Day, Sirs!

 

Yours

 

Derek Philpott

 

 

Dear Mr Phillpott,

Thank you for your letter; it's nice to know that you've taken the time to scrutinize our lyrics in context of the current agricultural climate.

Clearly you're not a farming man and you probably think that the main purpose of a combine harvester is to harvest crops? Well, yes, yes it is, BUT, what do we use it for the rest of year? Simple; cruisin' round for crumpet like Snoopiddy Dog-Dog.
Ya see,

 

 

 

To see The Wurzels' full spectacular

 

 

response, please support the

 

 

Crowdfunding campaign now and pre-

 

 

order your digital or hard-back copy of

 

 

the Unbound/Penguin book ''Dear Mr.

 

 

Pop Star''....and get your name in print

 

 

in the back!!

 

Click here

 

unbound.com/books/dear-mr-pop-star

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


All the best,



The Wurzels

 

 

 

 

©2009-2014 Dawson-Rice | Website designed with the splendid help of Oast One.