Dear Kim Wilde

Whilst doing the washing-up the other day, what should come on the radio but your tinnitus Top Twenty smash. Indeed, it started up just as I was rinsing off the microwave turntable from the hot tap. Thus, in both a synchronous and non-intentional homage, I was therefore performing the very act of the 1981 UK Number 11 chart placing at the very moment of its Ken Bruce Show-derived transmission.

As much as the H20/brittle non-cystalline solid interface cerebral annoyance noise hit is to be admired, however, the fact that the sound supposedly replicative of ''Water On Glass'' so vastly differs my own household chore-related generation is an, if you will pardon the pun, ‘jarring’ anomaly which one hopes won’t last and will pass. Yours is a high-pitched plinky plinky affair, whilst mine is either a dripping or gushing dependent on how much pressure is applied in a clockwise direction. Indeed, the sound of the liquid ''cascading down'' does not differentiate no matter what surface it comes into contact with, be it stainless steel (a spoon), china (an egg cup), or Tupperware (Tupperware).

Considering that we have ''asked Facebook'' for the likely source of the effect, and, we think, established contact with a gentleman present at the actual recording, we feel, Ms. Wilde that it may be time to ''come clean'' and perform the New Wave favourite as ''Prophet 5 Sample and Hold Mode'', ''Belltree chime with reverb'', or ''High Bell Patch'' or ''Mini Moog Pulse'' (both of which do actually scan quite well) at all future festival and concert performances.

Yours

 

 

D. Philpott

 

 

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